Major: Animal Science, Career: undecided

All A's in high school, valedictorian of the senior class, 4.17 GPA for doing high school college courses, Dean's list and President's list first year in college at a 4-year university, on my way to medical school as cream of the crop. Ever since I was a little girl, I pushed myself to get the best grades in school. I remember crying in 4th grade for getting one B that year on my report card. If you think that's pathetic, I did it again in high school for getting a B on a single chemistry exam. Grades have been everything to me. My parents saw that I got good grades, and so it simply became expected of me. Of course, this kind of expectation was self-imposed, so, to my parents, no news was good news. Somehow, I always had this fear in the back of my mind that after years of good grades, if I made a bad grade, everyone would think I wasn't smart anymore or that I became lazy and didn't study enough.

My motivation for getting good grades was not for people to think I was smart or that I was special in any way. Rather, my whole goal in pushing myself was to get into medical school to become a veterinarian. Since vet school is so competitive, only those with GPA 3.5 or higher are even looked at in choosing students. I wanted to be the cream of the crop with the highest grades a student could achieve. That way, my entrance into vet school would be practically guaranteed.

I love animals. All my life I've wanted to be around animals. When I was 8 years old, my 2nd grade teacher was talking with the class about different jobs we could do when we grow up. She said that the boys might like playing with fire and become a firefighter, or that girls might like drawing pictures and become an artist; but when she said we might like animals and become a veterinarian, I knew exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up: a veterinarian. Ever since then, whenever I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would say a veterinarian. My parents and my grandparents all said that God had revealed to me at an early age what He wanted me to do. I thought so too.

In high school I became close friends with a girl who loved animals just like me. She too wanted to become a veterinarian. I spent a lot of time with her and saw how dedicated she was to her grades like I was. Being a year older than me, she started looking at colleges and felt she should go to a school close to home. Cal Poly Pomona was a perfect fit for her where she could begin working on her first 4 years of pre-vet courses and still be close to home. That sounded wonderful to me, so I followed in her footsteps, doing the exact same thing. To get into Cal Poly Pomona, however, I had to have perfect grades since only a few students were being admitted that year. Being one of the few students out of a hundred chosen, I got into Cal Poly Pomona. I planned on being there with my friend for the next few years.

As a christian, I knew that I didn't have to become a missionary or a Sunday school teacher in order to serve the Lord with an occupation. I could use any career to bring Him glory. It did puzzle me, however, how I would be able to use a Veterinarian degree to serve Christ. Witnessing through interaction with people and healing God's creatures seemed like a good fit, but being a doctor wouldn't allow me to do very many activities at the church. My time would be eaten up with paper work and research. My high school friend talked about using her vet degree to go on missions trips to countries where a village cow is sick and needed treatment. She could heal the cow and share the gospel all in one trip. That sounded great to me, so I adopted that idea as my own, even though I wasn't personally called to it. It made me feel better about being a christian veterinarian.

Soon enough, I realized that Cal Poly Pomona was not going to work for me. Without being there longer than a month, I knew I couldn't stay there. The budget cuts California faced forced the schools to cut back teachers and resources, which in turn limited the amount of classes available to students. I had decided to sign up for priority registration by pledging to take enough units to graduate in 4 years. That gave me a little bit of an advantage, but it did not guarantee classes by any means. It was a fight just to get on a waitlist for a class. The pressure of taking enough classes and still maintaining straight A's was enough to worry about, but when the teachers started switching around in the middle of the quarter, and the staff telling me conflicting information on what classes I actually needed, I knew I needed to get out of there and fast. That's when I decided to look at Texas A&M as a possibility. Plus, if I got in now, I would have greater chances of getting into their vet school later. So, after a year of stressing out over getting good grades at Cal Poly Pomona, I finally was able to move to Texas.

My whole life I have been pushing for this, claiming it was God's will. From report cards in elementary school, to valedictorian in high school, to President's list at Cal Poly Pomona, to now Texas; every thing has been leading up to me getting here. But when I came out here, something happened. As I started meeting people, and going to church and other Bible studies, God has been working on my heart. I am finally starting to realize that my purpose for being out here is not so I can go to vet school. I don't know exactly why I am here, but I know that there is so much more God wants to show me out in Texas. I have been in a spiritual lull for the past couple years, just waiting for my faith to be on fire again. I have been on my knees praying for God to show me direction. I thought I had everything all planned out, but in reality, I don't. But that's it! I don't have it all planned out! And I don't need to.

God led me here to Texas in less than a year of learning it's existence. Every step in getting here was a major step of faith. I didn't know how it was all going to work out, but God showed me where to go and I simply followed. God is in control of my future... not me. Relying on that, and not on myself, is one of the most difficult challenges I face. God wanted me out here for a reason. That reason is so much more than simply school. My faith is on fire! And not because I know where to go or what to do, but because God is showing me incredible things about my future, one little step at a time. Relying on God rather than myself is so much more assuring and fulfilling than anything I have ever experienced.

So now that I am out here, my goal is to pursue a deeper relationship with Christ so that I can hear Him tell me my next step. I'm still pursuing veterinary education, and I know I am called to work with animals. However, where God has me in this field, is still yet to be seen... what God wants me to do out here is still yet to be seen... but as long as I remain close to Him and trust Him rather than myself, I know I will be exactly who God wants me to be, doing exactly what He has called me to do. It's not about grades, and it's not about school. It's about what God wants to show me so that I can better serve Him. Praise the Lord!

From California to Texas

Well, here I am in Texas. I’m swamped with homework and the addition of a job is just about to make my schedule even crazier. I share a house with strangers, and I am 15,000 miles away from the nearest familiar face. Sometimes I wonder how I even got here, or why I even came in the first place. Even people that meet me and find out that I left California think I must have lost my mind. To be completely honest, I don’t even know for sure why I am out here. I felt a leading from the Lord and in a leap of faith I followed Him here.

Little did I know when I visited this place last September that I would be living here in less than a year. My infatuation with the vet school at Texas A&M led me to look into the possibility of attending. As I searched for God’s will in this, I saw how the doors of opportunity came flying open. There has been no mistake in thinking this has been ordained by God. So many people have been a part of getting me where I am. Each person was used in such a miraculous way, from getting me my classes, to providing me with a job. I have been incredibly blessed!

After three weeks out here, I am still getting my bearings. I know I am supposed to be here, but I am still trying to figure out why God has me here instead of somewhere else. Not that I mind. I love Texas. But there are other vet schools I could be attending, including the pre-vet program I left back in California. Why God has chosen this course for me now is a big part of discovering who I am in Christ, and what His purpose is for me here.